


How to Seduce Your Best Friend

by Uchuu



Series: How to Spend a Life With You [2]
Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Developing Relationship, F/F, Implied Jasper/Peridot (Steven Universe), Sex Talk
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-21
Updated: 2018-06-21
Packaged: 2019-05-26 07:16:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,500
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14995655
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Uchuu/pseuds/Uchuu
Summary: Peridot just wants to find a way to seduce her girlfriend but her planning does not go very well.





	How to Seduce Your Best Friend

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this fic back when I wrote, "How to Date Your Best Friend," and I found it rummaging around in my Amedot folder. I do not remember ever posting it? But if you have read it before, that is the reason.

Peridot remembers her life growing up. She remembers her mother pushing her to become a doctor or to work in the medical field, but she remembers declaring herself an inventor when she was seven. She liked working with her hands, liked taking things apart and figuring out what made things work and how to make them work even better. It's why she liked being in relationships, liked the science behind it and the reasoning behind everything else. She spent most of her college life like this, making a name for herself as an inventor, an engineer, and a program designer while living in the same small apartment in Beach City with Jasper; constantly running into short term relationships and one-night stands. She's never much for spending time with others and when Jasper moved out to get her masers, Peridot ends up spending the next five years indoors, working on her inventions and spending time with Amethyst.

She likes to thank Jasper for introducing her to Amethyst in the first place. Her sophomore year she failed a chemistry class due to a family situation and Jasper convinced her to retake the advanced course. She takes a test to place, nearly fails, and is paired up with Amethyst in the course. Amethyst was a freshman at the time, a freshman whom Peridot has absolutely no idea how she managed to get into the class in the first place—due to per-requisites—but she's glad she met the girl because she was the reason Peridot managed to keep herself from failing the course. Amethyst likes to pretend she isn't as smart as she is, was always afraid of looking 'uncool' with the group of friends and her constant troubles with the law when she's sixteen almost gets her kicked out of school but Peridot tries to help her the best she can. Helps her keep her focus on school, focus on her aspirations of going to nursing school and working in a real hospital one day.

The two have always been there for each other and Peridot's not sure why she didn't see this any sooner; that this is a person she could see herself spending the rest of her life with and be comfortable doing so. Maybe she was afraid of commitment or maybe she was afraid of turning into her mother, but she knew a good step would be to finally move out of her small apartment and closer to the city. She even asks Amethyst to move in with her, feeling like their relationship is all over the place and if they settled down together in one place things would work out better. Not just their sex life—which is nonexistent and something Peridot desperately wants to develop—but them as a couple.

Peridot moves out of her apartment after her mother buys a two-floor apartment, encouraging her daughter to get a tenant for the upstairs which she never does. On her twenty-seventh birthday she finally finishes unpacking, cleaning the place up and making it a home for her and Amethyst and not just another apartment they shared together. Peridot decides to live on the downstairs floor and keeps the upstairs room uninhabited but allows Greg to stay inside if the weather gets too bad outside. The place is three times bigger than her old apartment and while the extra room is welcomed, the second bedroom, bathroom and new basement that Peridot has no idea what to do with because annoying to her. Amethyst decides to store things in the rooms until they convert the second bedroom into a mini office and the basement into a laundry room along with shelving space for storage.

Peridot becomes fond of the place, becomes incredibly fond of her relationship with Amethyst and as much as she wants to figure out her feelings for her girlfriend, she finds it difficult to talk to anyone except for Jasper about it. Peridot enjoyed the move, enjoyed packing and unpacking, enjoyed organizing and creating new memories but now that things have settled down she keeps thinking about their past conversations. Peridot wanted to try and take Amethyst out on a date, to try and do something real couples do but none of her ideas ever panned out. She likes to enlist in Jasper for help but she isn't sure if Jasper could help her now.

The best thing about moving was she three blocks from Jasper's house and down the street from her favorite diner. Her mother made a good choice in helping her pick out the apartment she wanted to rent and it was close enough to the hospital where Amethyst would be able to work after she passes her test and close enough for her mother to come visit compared to the thirty-five minute drive she was making. She thinks far too much about the current situations and not enough on Amethyst and what she's supposed to be doing about her relationship.

She didn't care about her job or her mother or whatever was happening with the strange weather outside. What she does care about is Amethyst and she gets so anxious just thinking about it. She groans for Jasper to pay attention to her on the opposite end of the dinner table, taps her stylus against the rim of her coffee cup in a rhythmic beat to the song playing over the diner's speakers. She doesn't receive the automatic response she is looking for from Jasper when she does groan, so she whines this time and still no response. She takes a few minutes before trying again, looking for some sort of sympathetic response but is still being ignored. She wants Jasper to ask her what's troubling her, but still doesn't even get a glance. Peridot kicks her gently underneath the table, “will you just answer me?” 

Jasper looks unfazed, picks up the cheap coffee mug in front of her and takes a sip before setting it back down. “Fine. I'll bite. Whatever is wrong with my darling Peridot?”

Peridot rolls her eyes, “I'm trying to come up with ways to properly seduce Amethyst.” She tries to keep her voice down in the small diner even though it's before dinner rush and the place is quite empty. They always take the same seat in the corner, away from all employees because Jasper always tries to hit on them but it's worse when they come over to refill their coffee cups or take their plates away.

Jasper nearly chokes on her coffee, “why do you want my help for? Isn't that a personal problem that you two should figure out? You know, without my help. I can't even believe you're still on that list, it's been weeks.”

Peridot groans again, “just help me!” She started the list about three weeks ago, when the few dates she did manage to go on with Amethyst weren't as successful as she wanted them to be. The list started off with simple things—cheesy things—like getting roses, a candle lit dinner, candles, romantic music, and dancing, maybe thousands of rose petals? Everything she listed had one hundred possibilities of failing: Peridot is a terrible cook unless it's authentic Korean cuisine or comes in a box, Amethyst is allergic to plant pollen and roses were out of the question, both were clumsy and knowing herself, Peridot would simply trip over the candles and set the place aflame. Romantic music and dancing wasn't a bad choice, but Peridot tap-dances, and Amethyst does...Whatever it is that Amethyst does, and Peridot expects it to end in failure. A trip to the botanical gardens? Peridot remembers again—after suddenly forgetting—that Amethyst is allergic to most flowers.

“Can't you just tell me what the problem is like a normal person instead of your ten-page list of scribbles?”

“Uhm, in a minute and it's not ten pages, it's twenty-six with proper formatting. Do you think releasing like a thousand white doves is bad?”

“Amethyst is allergic to pet dander.”

“Ugh, what isn't she allergic to?” She crosses off another item and drags and drops them into another a little box on the screen, “what about chivalry?”

“Are you trying to confuse your girlfriend or seduce her? How the hell is opening a door for her or pulling the seat out going to get you laid? She's not that kind of girl.”

“Fine.” Peridot huffs for the umpteenth time. “I guess I can tell you.” She slides her stylus back into the device and reaches for the glass cup on the table and takes a sip from the straw. “So, you know how you and I were...” She squints, “intimate,” Jasper bites back a laugh, “before we started dating.”

“Yes. I'm aware.” Jasper and Peridot never really discussed their romantic relationship because it was so short lived. Their friendship was a bond that an intimate relationship didn't change—much like hers and Amethyst's—but it was never a real relationship. They were always just best friends who had sex and at the end of the day it wasn't what Peridot wanted. “So what? Amethyst isn't putting out?”

Peridot groans at how simply Jasper had put it.

“You two really haven't?”

“Well, we've talked about it. She said she would be comfortable with it and is all ready to move forward but I don't know why we haven't yet. Like, I know Amethyst. We've been dating for over a year and we've known each other for ten. I know all of her past relationships and how she conducts herself in those situations, but when I drop hints or try to initiate anything she gets really awkward.”

“Awkward how?” Jasper sets her mug down on the table. “Does she push you off of her and run out of the room screaming or what?”

“Well, I've never literally thrown myself at her because that would be very dangerous and will most likely hurt. Usually though, she just gets awkward with how she talks to me. Like, if I said the words, 'do you want to have sex,' she'd just clear her throat and laugh it off probably before getting up to leave the room or going to bed.”

“Maybe she's not sexually attracted to you.” Jasper says, half as a joke but also taking the conversation seriously.

“No, that isn't the problem. Our relationship in the first month was fine and extremely normal for two people who just started a relationship. The basic clothes on clothes contact and a lot of kissing, sometimes skin on skin touching but I don't know.” Jasper tries to keep the conversation serious and not make fun of Peridot's explanation. “It's been over a month since we've kinda sorta had the conversation and I don't really know what to do.”

“Why can't you directly ask her? Get naked and go, 'hey, want to have sex?'” Jasper shrugs, looking up when the waitress comes over to hand them their check and take the empty coffee mug from the table before leaving again. The interruption let Jasper think of what to say next and she digs into her jacket sitting on the empty spot on the booth for her wallet as she talks. “Honestly, Amethyst is probably worried. I know she's always been worried when it came to your relationship but maybe she really thinks she's not going to be good enough for you. Remember, Amethyst really cares about you compared to most people she's been with and she could be completely afraid of ruining things. I'm not Amethyst though, I can't really speak for her so you're going to have to suck it up and talk to her again.”

“Why are you good at that?”

“Good at what?”

“You and Amethyst are both really good at reading people and here I am, confused and thinking I can impress Amethyst with flowers and doves.”

“Which she's allergic to.”

Peridot swears under her breath before crossing out the few items on her screen.

“When you were studying in college; I was banging girls. I understand how women think.”

“I don't think it works that way, Jas. Did you really spend seven years in college for the girls?”

“Have you seen the nurses and doctors at the hospital?”

“You know my mom works at that hospital.”

“And your mom is hot, case closed.”

Peridot makes a face.

“Not to mention she's like forty-two and newly divorced.”

“For the second time.”

Jasper shrugs.

Peridot gets so annoyed when people must mention her mother's age. It's just another reminder of how young she was when Peridot was born. The reasoning behind it was some master plan to have children and not have it impact her future career. It's why Peridot had lived overseas for most of her child hood, why she spent more time with her father—who was also a doctor—her uncle, nannies, and the hospital daycare than she did with her own mother. “I'm not sure if you're like...trying to become my new mother which would make the casual sex we have very disturbing or trying to find a sugar daddy.” She rubs her temples, “besides, you tried to sleep with my mother the day you turned eighteen.”

“Correction, it was the day after I turned eighteen,” she smiles, “besides, she only said no because—”

Peridot groans loudly, “please stop talking about having sex with my mother or I will never sleep with you again ever. I do not want that picture in my head.” Peridot's not even sure how she got past the awkward crush Jasper had on her mother, but it ended very quickly after they began to date.

Jasper mocks her as she gets up from the booth and grabs her bag. “Do you want to come over?”

“If you promise you won't call my mom and ask her to join.”

“No promises,” she teases.

The office Jasper works for is only opened four days a week and while the hours Amethyst works vary, the hours she’s awake are the hours Peridot's asleep but the both women have schedules that work perfectly for Peridot's situation. The situation being she really likes sleeping in the same bed as someone. When she lived alone the constant work and lack of sleep didn't make her think twice about sleeping alone but the more she delved into one-night stands and relationships, the more she craved it. She had Amethyst now and Jasper whenever she wanted but when they were at work and she was alone, she couldn't sleep until she had that warmth by her side.

Peridot was a night owl in the first place because of the sudden bursts of creativity that hit her. It helped her get work done, programing for games and of course streaming when her and her online friends would play together. Some nights she slept all morning and into the late afternoon and some days she didn't sleep at all. 

The afternoon is usually around the time Peridot comes home if she stays the night at Jasper's. Amethyst is always asleep on the couch when she returns but this time she isn't, she's walking around the apartment half naked and looked to have had just come out from the shower. Peridot tries to ignore her and throws her bag in the corner near the door and kicks her shoes off before heading into the kitchen. Her new apartment was downstairs and three times bigger than her old apartment—she thanks her mother for that—and they have room for a decent coffee machine which is exactly what Peridot needs in this instance.

“Why are you awake?” Peridot asks, curious because Amethyst is never awake before twelve on her days off.

“Dude, your mom came over. She said she called you twelve times and you didn't answer and so she came here and woke me up. I told her you weren't here, and I didn't know where you were. Then she made that face that you make when you're annoyed and then I told her to stop being a bitch and let me go back to sleep.”

“Please tell me you didn't actually say that.” Peridot whines as she finishes setting up the coffee filter in the machine, so she can brew the pot and then takes her cellphone from her pocket. She purposely ignored the calls from her mother and the voicemail.

“I'm paraphrasing. So, she said to tell you that she wants you to...” Amethyst comes into the kitchen, thankfully having put on a top, “I forget to be honest. I tend to zone out when she talks to me.” She presses a kiss to her girlfriend's cheek. “Did you go home with Jasper?”

“Yeah, right after Jasper told me how attractive my mother was and how much she wanted to have sex with her.”

Amethyst laughs, “well, your mom is hot in a weird domin-” Peridot puts her hand over Amethyst's mouth which Amethyst licks.

“Don't even try to finish that sentence.” She lowers her hand, wiping on Amethyst's shirt.

“You got work stuffs to do today?” Amethyst asks as she watches Peridot go into the cabinet to grab a mug.

“A bit of reprogramming and I need to revamp my presentation for my class.”

“I can't believe you suckered a bunch of people into paying two hundred dollars to learn how to use your program.”

“It's an advanced program that can help control machinery and other equipment from the comfort of your home. My mom loves it.”

“No shit.” Amethyst walks out of the kitchen and Peridot hears her turn on the television.

Peridot becomes frustrated waiting for their coffee machine to work and removes the glass pot and puts her mug in place of it. This speeds up the process and she's able to take the mug, turn off the coffee machine and head into the living room to sit next to Amethyst.

“Those the clothes you wore last night?” She asks and Peridot shrugs. “Are you guys still having sex?”

“Yeah, why?”

Amethyst shrugs, “no reason.” She changes the channel.

“If it bothers you-”

“It doesn't.”

“If it bothers you, tell me.”

“I just told you, it doesn't.”

Peridot can hear the anger in her voice and takes a sip of her coffee before putting it down on the table. “I'll just change.”

Peridot heads into her room and begins to dispose of the clothes she had been wearing, a simple shirt and jeans. She had taken a shower at Jasper's but dressed back into her dirty clothes just to have something to wear in the first place. She rummages through her dresser, a thong, shorts, and a tank top were the next best thing and she begins to redress herself as she thinks about Amethyst's responses. She had been comfortable with Peridot and Jasper's relationship; Peridot made sure she was before anything happened between them. So, this sudden—was it—jealousy she showed through her voice was strange to Peridot.

She grabs the cardigan on her bed and her laptop charging on the table along with her wireless keyboard as she enters back into the living room and sits down next to Amethyst again. She picks up her mug sets her laptop where the cup once was before twisting the screen and turning it on and waiting for it to start up, fan art of her favorite television show popping up as her screen saver. She looks up and notices Amethyst is still flipping channels before settling on the cooking channel and watching reruns of competitions they had both seen a thousand times before. They're mostly quiet, Peridot wonders if Amethyst is mad at her and finishes her coffee within the first ten minutes of the episode they're watching. Amethyst will occasionally ask a question about an item on the show and Peridot will either give her the correct answer or make a bad joke, and Amethyst will occasionally playfully kick Peridot in the leg when she lays down on the couch and wants to put her feet in her girlfriend’s lap.

Peridot's manages to finish up some emails she needs to send out to clients and edit out an entry on her blog before she can completely relax but with how Amethyst is acting towards her, she isn't sure if she would be able to. “Are you going to do this all day?” She asks, not wanting to start something but at the same time wanting Amethyst to tell her what's wrong.

“I'm not doing anything.” She huffs, reaching her arm out lazily to try and grab the remote on the table.

She looks away from her laptop screen, continuing to type with the keyboard in her lap. “You do know relationships don't work without proper communication and-”

“I'm fine.”

“I know it's hard because we were friends first, but I need you to be opened and-”

“Oh my God, shut up.” Amethyst groans, “it's not that.”

“Well, are you going to tell me what it is?”

Amethyst grabs the remote to mute the television and then shifts on the couch until she's properly looking at Peridot. “I just think it's weird that you spend all this time with Jasper and we've never actually done anything together.”

“We've done things together.”

“Name one thing.”

“We hang out all of the time.”

“Yeah but like, aren't people supposed to like go out and do shit as a couple?”

“You mean like a date? We do that sometimes.” The word hits Peridot because she realized instead of her stupid list she could have just asked Amethyst out somewhere. A movie or going to dinner; not a romantic dinner on the back of a boat when Peridot easily got seasick or beekeeping.

“Oh yeah, that's what it's called.”

“Where do you want to go?”

“I don't know. Pick somewhere.”

“I did actually compose a list of possible things we could do together.”

“A list?” She snorts. “Of course you did. Still trying to figure out ways to seduce me I take it.”

“Yes.” Peridot sets her keyboard down and picks up the screen of her computer from the table, sliding a bunch of documents around until she opens the list she had been working on. “At first they sounded like a good idea but with your allergies and me being-”

“A klutz.”

She ignores Amethyst, “vertically challenged.” She glances over the list, “I figured most of these are just bad ideas.” She then hands Amethyst the screen and watches the woman stare at it.

Amethyst scrolls down the list and stops after reading the words, 'bee keeping,' and looks underneath it where there were multiple bullet points about bees. “You know I'm allergic to bees, right?” She hears Peridot curse under her breath before scrolling down the screen, “sex on the roof of a car, sex in a cage underwater surrounded by sharks, naked sushi.”

“Those were Jasper's ideas. She was there when I was making it.”

“Uh huh. Are all of the sexual ones her idea?”

“Affirmative.”

“How many did you come up with?” She's still scrolling through the list, “and couldn't you have come up with normal date ideas?”

“There are two hundred and fifty-six. Some of them are normal.”

“Extreme LARPing? Rope tying lessons? Whoa, I am not going skinny dipping off a twenty-foot drop with you. Can you even swim?”

“Okay, so none of them are normal.” Peridot moves, squeezing in between Amethyst and the back of the couch to lay next to her. “I'm bad at this, what did you expect? I haven't seriously dated someone since Jasper and everything Jasper and I did together wasn't exactly rated PG-13.” 

“So, what can you and I do that isn't going to kill me?”

“Go to the movies?” She reaches out to touch the screen, turning it off and reaching over Amethyst to set it back on the table before getting back into position.

“Pass. I have a yearlong ban from that one theater for the popcorn incident and nothing interesting is out right now.”

“The zoo?” She leans her head on Amethyst's shoulder and Amethyst presses a hand to her hair.

“Nah, I dated one of the managers once and she makes security throw me out if she sees me.”

“Where are you allowed to go?”

“Uh, I think my ban from Funland Arcade was lifted?” Amethyst had a habit of getting into trouble with owners when she was living in Beach City and while Ocean Town wasn't nearly as fun, at least she could go to the mall or skating rink without interference.

“So nowhere good.” She sighs, “you could come with me to my conference because unless you're banned from everywhere in California. I'm sure there's something we could do together if you were interested.”

“Might as well go to Korea while we're at it.” Amethyst rolls her eyes. She's never been a big fan of traveling or airplanes.

“Do not even joke about that because I would totally take you there but really, what do you want to do? If I took you out tomorrow, where would you want to go?

Amethyst thought about it, trying not to make a bad joke and be sincere for once. She feels as if it is her fault they were even having the conversation in the first place. “I think something simple just works better for us.” She still couldn't think of anything and groans as she slides her fingers into Peridot's hair. "We could go to the diner I guess. Do a movie night? Double date with Pearl and her girlfriends?"

“I'm just too creative with my ideas and you're banned from everything.”

Amethyst chuckles, “eh, I'd say that's about right. Maybe we can just do more stuff together in general, not really a date but...Like, we don't even go grocery shopping together.”

“Last time we went grocery shopping together you knocked an entire display case over because you were riding a cart down an aisle. Then you drove the car into a manager and my mom had to pay for the ambulance and any follow up appointments. You're lucky you didn't get banned or arrested.”

“You can't take me anywhere.” Amethyst chuckles.

Peridot wraps her arm around Amethyst's waist, “we can do that though. Try to go out and do things as a normal couple who you know, lives together. I guess we could try to be normal. Why are you so comfortable?”

“Why are you such a nerd?”

Peridot mocks her, closing her and eyes and laying there. She can hear Amethyst fussing with the television remote again but she's turning it off this time before putting the remote back onto the table, but it falls and drops onto the rug. “What do you even like besides getting into trouble with the law?”

“Uh, in what way?”

“In general?”

“I don't know? You?”

“Gross.” Peridot makes a face even though Amethyst can't see it.

"Love you too."

**Author's Note:**

> My tumblr is UchuuWrites


End file.
